I'll just get this out of the way right now

1. I don't want to find a new place for my master key at work.  The place I've hidden it for the last few months has been great, but this morning I came in to find the clip on the floor and the magnet nowhere to be found.  I ask you, how hard is it to put things back the way you found them?  How do you lose a big magnet?  Now I have to find a new place for my key because, without the magnet, I can't put it where it was.  Fun.
2. Maybe I'll just keep the key with me at all times.  That'll show 'em.
3. At least I was able to find a parking spot.
4. We're out of water bottles for the water cooler.  My quest to stay hydrated is thwarted!  Thwarted, I tell you!
5. I don't understand how someone can be kind, generous, and thoughtful, and yet wildly immature at the same time.  It's a paradox.
6. If you've had a bronchial cough since Thanksgiving, you should probably get that checked.
7. You know how sometimes you hate yogurt but there's nothing else quick and convenient?  It's been like that for the last couple of months.  It's all I can do to not gag while eating it.
8. At least I can listen to Paul Simon's Graceland online.  That's very helpful.