Saturday, November 29, 2008

Reunion.com can bite me.

For those of you not on Facebook, I'm copying and pasting a brief but highly descriptive rant about why I deleted my Reunion.com account.

Here is why I'm deleting my account. I will provide commentary later, I'm sure.

1. Subject: Nice Girl

Body: HI

YOU ARE GIF OF GOD
WELCOME TO US

BYE BYE

2. Subject: Nice Girl

Body: Hi Heidi

I am Happy Talk to you
you are angel of god
I would like meet wich you
any time Call me ***-*******

bye bye

my angel

3. Subject: Hmm!!!! shot at love

Body: I met a fredia long time ago in hounduras? You look so much like her' but she has passed away now.So i know its not her' but you are pretty and i was ust kidding about the shot at love thing.I heard on the tv show and thought it would funny to ask a girl that.

take care.

4. Subject: Nice pic!

Body: I don't know you but I thought I would drop a line and say hello!

5. Subject: hello

Body: Hi,

My name is M_____ Brown, I am a new person in this site, I'm a fun and energetic guy looking for someone to spend time with and hopefully grown with into a relationship. People say that I have a sense of humor and that I'm fun to be around. I love to laugh, and I love making people laugh. I consider myself a good listener and enjoy great conversation. My family and friends are very important in my life, and I spend time with them whenever I have the opportunity. My music taste is very eclectic, ranging from alternative and classic rock to 80's music and current pop. I love sports, both watching on TV and going to games, but I'm also a guy who loves sappy, romantic movies. I like going out on the town and also love quiet times at home.

I'm looking for an honest and beautiful lady, who has a passionate heart and a kind soul -- someone with a rugged side, who's still in touch with her emotions. I love a great sense of humor, but need someone who can be serious too. Basically, I'm looking for a lady who knows who she is, loves life and wants to share her life with a guy who has so much to give.

You need trust to love, but first you need to love in order to trust, Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end. If it is meant to be, our hearts will find each other when we meet.

I will lovely to know more about you and you can send your reply to me (____guy_@yahoo.com) or you meet me online for yahoo messenger for instant chatting, I will be very glad to hear from you soon.

Thanks

6. Subject: Hello,

Body: AM MARK FROM NEW YORK, I REALLY LIKE YOUR PIC, I DO NOT KNOW IF YOU CARE FOR A CHAT? I REALLY WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND AND KNOW YOU BETTER, THIS IS MY ID M***********_100@YAHOO.COM
........HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON...CHEERS.

7. Subject: lets chat

Body: Hi Freckles.. Your picture cought my eye. I saw that you were single. Im single too, I work long hours in the feald of constrouction between that and two boys 18 & 20 it does`nt leave much time to find someone special.. being a little shy dosent help things. hope to hear from you..Nick

8. Subject: hello

Body: hello heidi,

i find you to be a very attractive woman and you have lovely smile so i thought i would drop in to say hello and to leave my email address :) if you would like to chat i would like to hear from you.

m******@freestylephoto.biz

michael

9. Subject: Hello

Body: Hello,i saw ur pics and profile on here and i think yu are cute and nice,i will like to hear from you so we can know eachother better....Steven

GAH. Are you people KIDDING ME?!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

cha-ching

I'm doing my usual Saturday morning routine, which involves not eating breakfast until I've balanced my budget spreadsheets. Today, I think I've done some math wrong (or Excel has done some math wrong, which can't be the case) because I have $200 more in my spreadsheets than I do in my actual bank account. I can't figure out why. I just went over my original worksheet and it's all right. All of it. This is SO weird.

Well. If all else fails, at the end of the year I'll either deposit or withdraw from my savings until I get an amount in my checking account that matches what's on my spreadsheets. This shouldn't be so annoying, but it is. I can't figure out where I messed up, or if it's just a result of my credit union not clearing things as soon as they happen. I know exactly what I make every month, I know I can roll over what I don't spend, but I don't know why I'm $200 off and it bothers me.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

One and only political statement:

Love her or hate her, Sarah Palin did something none of us have. This "soccer mom" became the vice presidential nominee of arguably the most powerful nation on earth. Any self-proclaimed feminist who asserted that Palin shouldn't have been nominated, that she should have stayed in her home state, that she shouldn't even have been a governor, that she should have kept her lipsticked mouth shut, that she should have stayed home with her children, has effectively put feminism back 50 years.

By saying that Palin was somehow inadequate for the job because she is a mother of a disabled baby and a pregnant teenager, you are also saying that YOU are inadequate for any job of this level. By saying that her personality was somehow inappropriate, you are also saying that YOUR personality quirks are not good enough for a position of power.

By saying that no "soccer mom" (Palin or Clinton) deserves to be in the White House, you have effectively told the entire world that women are still inferior and aren't good for anything but looking pretty and having children.

Thank you. Thank you for your hypocrisy. Thank you for telling the world, though your cruel commentary, that the United States, much as it fights for civil rights, does not respect its own female population. Thank you for negating the status of women even further by, within weeks of her nomination, making a pornographic film about her bid for Vice President. Thank you for making fun of her clothes and condemning the GOP for spending money on new clothes in the same breath.

Thank you for setting hundreds of years of feminism and the fight for equal opportunities on its ear. Thank you for telling women that they are still not good enough. It will take a long time to recover from this, and I hope not to hear any complaining about your proportionally lower salaries, your frustration about being judged only by the brand names you wear or your breast size, and your lack of representation in our nation's capital.

As a post script, I may not have liked Hillary Clinton, but I certainly respected her efforts and was disappointed when she lost the Democratic presidential nomination. I wonder what would have happened had she been nominated? Would she have come under the same level of criticism as Palin? Would the purveyors of pornographic filth have made a series of films about her? Would she have been applauded or condemned for spending money on clothes? I think, unfortunately, that we can answer "yes" to all those questions. It makes me very sad.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

I don't really want to smell like a Spanish rose.

I do not think deodorant should make you smell. I really don't. But have you any IDEA how hard it is to find unscented women's deodorant? HAVE YOU? It's nearly impossible.

I do not think it should take trips to four different grocery stores in order to find something that actually works and doesn't just come in a pretty package with all manner of egregiously false claims on it. Yeah, I'm SURE that the "satiny tropical" scent is going to get me a promotion/man/new car when I raise my arms after the nervous sweats I get at an audition or during a confrontation. SURE it is. What does tropical satin smell like, anyway? Knowing satin (and I do...) and the tropics, I can imagine it's not a nice smell. Number one, satin isn't known as a fabric that breathes, and the tropics are moist. You slap "satiny tropical" on a deodorant and I'm not going to be thinking about Rio in the 1930s films of Betty Grable. What I'm thinking is that it probably smells like Carnivale on the 3rd night. ESPECIALLY after you've already started sweating. Not pretty.

Dead serious, kids, this is a partial list of the scents available for your smelling pleasure, from drugstore.com:

the aforementioned satiny tropical
powder fresh (what?)
powder (what kind of powder?)
Asian pear (ok...)
cucumber-grapefruit (um)
jasmine orient (first thought: opium den or stripper name)
fresh (what does that even mean?)
African violet (you mean I get to smell like my grandma's window o' plants, mixed with sweat? nice...)
sheer powder (because powder is sheer, apparently)
woodspice with hops (just say it to yourself in context and TRY not to gag a little)
green tea (will it make me lose weight?)
lemongrass (at least it's not a trendy table planter)
morning fresh (people are so fresh in the mornings that there's no need to shower, apparently)
original clean (say what?)
cool and clean (what does cool smell like? Does it smell like Old Spice? Is that what the cool people wear?)
totally fresh (oh, so this one combines morning and powder)
honeysuckle rose (doesn't sound so bad, but when mixed with body oder? ugh.)
spring breeze (sometimes Spring breezes bring Lake Smell. yum!)
waterlily and freshmint (are you KIDDING me?)
spring fresh (so like spring breeze plus totally fresh?)
apricot (?!?)
active sport (have you SMELLED athletes? have you?!)
marathon fresh (I have no words)
fruity melon (FRUITY MELON?)
vanilla chai (I...just...my brain hurts)

OK, I need to stop and I'm only halfway through the list. Wow. That's just frightening. Now, I would like most of those in a body wash or shampoo or body spray, but not in deodorant. Where is the unscented? Where? Where is the magic bullet that won't make me smell like a theater dressing room after a show?

*sigh*

Saturday, November 1, 2008

NaBloPoMo

Yes, I'm finally jumping on the wagon. At the very least, this will help me from being bored during the slow days at work!

I'll post on one of my blogs every day, and I can make no guarantees that the posts will be coherent, relevant, or worth reading, but there you go. Maybe I can use this to do some personal history and creative writing, which would be great.

And this officially counts as my first post of November!